Drunk Turkey Recipes

GOOD OLD FASHIONED DRUNKEN TURKEY

Steps:

• Rub turkey with olive oil massaging it gently and roughly alternatively the turkey likes to be fondled for some reason.
• Then sprinkle the marjoram over the bird.
• Again make sure the turkey is covered-- she doesn't enjoy bare breasts or legs!
• Using the needle and syringe, inject the turkey with 1/2 cup of old expensive whiskey in various locations.
• When you are sure you have enough alcohol in it, spread its legs and throw in some marjoram then tress the cavity.
• Loosely cover the bird with aluminum foil.
• Place in oven, consistently basting it with the liquid on the bottom (composed of water, vegetable scraps, and the juices from the hot, wet steamy bird).
• Baste approximately every thirty minutes for the recommended time: About 4 1/2 hours for a 16-20 pound bird at 325F or until internal turkey temperature is 185F During the last hour of baking, coat turkey with whisky or other liquor every 15 minutes.
• To make gravy: Take the bird out of the pan to cut.
• Skim off the gunk and take out the remains of the vegetable scraps.
• Put the pan over a burner on the stove and turn on medium heat.
• Make a sludge of a few spoons of flour and a little cold water, and mix into the hot pan liquids, stirring and scraping the pan.
• Throw in some scraps of meat and reduce liquid by 1/3.
• Have a drink of whiskey and enjoy!

BEER-CAN TURKEY

Steps:

• Preheat a grill to medium (about 350 degrees F) on one side. Pour the beer into a turkey sitter (a ceramic stand that holds liquid). Or open the beer can, pour out a few tablespoons and place in a beer-can turkey stand.
• Combine the mustard powder, garlic powder, dried onion, paprika, granulated garlic, cumin, and salt and pepper to taste in a small bowl.
• Remove the neck, giblets and any excess fat from the turkey; discard. Rinse the turkey under cold water and pat dry with paper towels. Rub the cavity with 2 to 3 teaspoons of the spice mixture. Brush the outside of the turkey with the canola oil and place drumstick-end down on the sitter or stand. Rub the remaining spice mixture all over the turkey.
• Place the turkey (on the sitter or stand) on the cooler side of the grill. Cover and cook until the juices run clear and a thermometer inserted into the thickest part of the thigh registers 185 degrees F and 170 degrees F in the breast, 2 to 3 hours. Carefully remove the turkey from the grill, remove from the sitter or stand, and discard the beer. Transfer the turkey to a cutting board and let rest at least 20 minutes before carving.

BOURBON DRUNKEN UPSIDE-DOWN TURKEY

Steps:

• MARINADE PREP.
• In a bowl put Cheese Cloth (you will need about 3-5 packages -- depending on the size of your Turkey) and 3-4 cups of MAKERS MARK, let Cheese Cloth soak up Bourbon.
• Clean inside cavity of Turkey -- then Salt & Pepper inside cavity, and add 1 tablespoon of Herbs De Provence, sprinkle inside cavity.
• Carefully seperate the skin from the Turkey Breast -- take 1 Tablespoon of Herbs De Provence and put under skin of the breast -- be sure to massage the herbs under the skin so they can spread evenly under the skin -- if your having a hard time moving the herbs around -- just take a tablespoon of Makers Mark and put it under the skin it should help the herbs spread.
• Take 2 of the BOURBON SOAKED CHEESE CLOTH and stuff the inside of the Turkey -- don't pack it -- just lightly put it in place.
• *NOTE: If you DON'T HAVE A FLAVOR INJECTOR -- SKIP THIS STEP* -- With a flavor injector, inject the following spots with a full syringe of BOURBON -- FLIP TURKEY UPSIDE DOWN (DO NOT INJECT TURKEY BREAST SIDE UP!) -- INJECT BOURBON IN BOTH LEGS -- and UNDERNEATH THE BREAST (try to get the needle where the bone of the breast is) -- and INJECT BOTH WINGS.
• Wrap outside of Turkey with the remaining BOURBON SOAKED CHEESE CLOTH -- then WRAP the TURKEY & CHEESE CLOTH IN SARAN/PLASTIC WRAP and put in REFIDGERATOR AND MARINADE UPSIDEDOWN -- FLIPPING AND ROTATING THE TURKEY EVERY 6-8 hours -- NOTE: If you would like to inject the same spots every other time you rotate it will enhance the flavors more, but it may require an extra bottle of bourbon.
• 24-36 HOURS MARINADE TIME.
• COOKING PREP.
• Remove plastic wrap & cheese cloth -- also the cheese cloth inside the cavity -- take ALL the cheese cloth and RESOAK IN BOURBON.
• Melt 1/2 cup butter -- INJECT MELTED BUTTER IN SAME EXACT AREAS WHERE THE BOURBON WAS INJECTED -- *hint* -- TURKEY NEEDS TO BE UPSIDEDOWN.
• Rub Olive Oil all over Turkey -- SALT & PEPPER THE ENITRE OUTSIDE TURKEY, AND THEN LIGHTLY SPRINKLE HERBS DE PROVENCE ALL OVER TURKEY AS WELL.
• Gather Garlic Cloves, Onion, Thyme, Marjoram, Rosemary, Oranges, Parsley and Sage -- Cut the Garlic Cloves & Onion in half, leaving the skin on -- drizzle with olive oil and sprinkle with salt & pepper. Cut Oranges into fouths.
• WRAP EVERYTHING (Garlic Cloves, Onion, Thyme, Marjoram, Rosemary, Oranges, Parsley and Sage) IN THE BOURBON SOAKED CHEESE CLOTH AND STUFF INTO TURKEY.
• Add entire stick of butter to bottom of roasting pan.
• OKAY NOW COOK THE TURKEY UPSIDEDOWN -- TRUST ME I'VE MADE THE MISTAKE OF COOKING THE TURKEY BREAST SIDE UP AND ITS ALWAYS DRY.-- TENT THE ENTIRE TURKEY IN THE OVEN WITH ALUMINUM FOIL UP UNTIL THE FINAL 2 1/2 HOURS OF COOKING -- 2 1/2 hours before its done take the tent off and FLIP the TURKEY BREAST SIDE UP (the best way to do this is having 2 people maybe more depending on the size and 2 of the same size pans and place one on top of the other and flip) -- NOTE: TO GET A CRISP GOLDEN BREAST TURN UP THE OVEN AN EXTRA 125 DEGREES FOR 25-35 MINUTES.
• KEEP BASTING IN NATURAL JUICES EVERY 30 MINUTES -- BASTE, BASTE, BASTE -- BASTING IS KEY!
• This will be so flavorfull and juicy, your dinner guests will BE AMAZED.

DRUNKIN TURKEY

Steps:

• 1. Preheat oven to 325.
• 2. Pull out turkey neck and organs. Rinse turkey inside and out, neck and organs. Place everything in roasting pan.
• 3. Pour beer in and around turkey. Pout water around turkey.
• 4. Cut 1/2 onion in large wedges the other 1/2 in smaller wedges. Place 3 large wedges inside of turkey. All other wedges large and small around turkey
• 5. Place about a handfull if baby carrots inside turkey. Scatter all other carrots around turkey.
• 6. Be sure to use all of celery including the leaves and inside stalks. Chop leaves and inside stalks. Place inside turkey. Chop rest of celery and place around turkey.
• 7. Take 1 tablespoon of butter cut in half and spread under skin of turkey by breast. Take other tablespoon of butter and rub all over outside of turkey.
• 8. Rub olive oil all over outside of turkey.
• 9. Season turkey, inside and out, and the vegetables and beer broth around turkey with salt and pepper. Sprinkle rosemary all over turkey inside and out.
• 10. Cover turkey with foil. Place in oven set at 325 and bake covered for about 3 hours. Uncover and roast for remaining time basting with juices often. Most directions say about 4 hours but count on it taking longer.
• 11. When done, remove Turkey from oven, cover with foil and let rest for 20 minutes.
• 12. Place turkey on platter, spoon vegetables around turkey and serve.

DRUNK TURKEY

Steps:

• Thaw the turkey and place in a roasting pan. Put 2 sticks of butter in the cavity of the turkey. Take 1/2 stick of butter and rub on the turkey itself. Pour 1/4 can of beer in the bottom of the roasting pan. Place desired amount of seasonings in the beer can (we love tons of flavor, so we use about 1 tablespoons each of garlic salt, cajun seasoning and greek seasoning and 1 teaspoons of onion salt. Place can into the cavity of turkey, top first. Leave the can sticking out of the cavity a couple of inches. Pat seasonings on the buttered turkey. Cover with aluminum foil. Cook as directed on bird.

DRUNK TURKEY BITES

Steps:

• Heat oil in a skillet over medium heat. Cook and stir kielbasa and onion in hot oil until the onion begins to soften, about 5 minutes.
• Gently whisk beer, brown sugar, and mustard together in a bowl; pour into the skillet.
• Bring the mixture to a boil and cook until the volume of the liquid reduces by half, about 15 minutes. . Season with salt and pepper.

MEXICAN DRUNKEN TURKEY

Steps:

• Defrost turkey.
• Remove giblets and wash with cold water inside and out.
• Pat dry.
• Sprinkle with salt, pepper and coriander inside and out.
• Tie the wings and drumsticks.
• (Ordinary sewing thread will work just fine) Peel the garlic cloves and crush.
• Mix the crushed garlic with the butter and the cognac.
• Rub this paste all over the turkey and return the turkey to the refrigerator to marinate for an hour.
• Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
• Baste the turkey with the chicken broth and wine.
• Do it gently so you don’t rub off the garlic paste.
• Cover the turkey with aluminum foil and roast for about 90 minutes, basting frequently with wine and chicken broth.
• If your oven isn’t very accurate turn the pan a few times during baking.
• After about 90 minutes of cooking remove the aluminum foil cover.
• Sprinkle with paprika all over and raise the oven temperature to 500 degrees.
• Stop basting.
• This will allow the turkey skin to brown and crisp.
• Continue cooking until the skin is crisp and not watery or greasy.
• Flip the turkey so it crisps on the other side as well.
• If you are butchering your own turkey feed it two glasses of wine or cognac the day before.
• It really does make a difference in the cooked flavor.